Follow-up: Top 3 Stories

If you followed my last post, Top 3 Stories, you read about the Jerry Springer episode that my neighbors acted out and you saw the pic of the girl talking on the phone from her roof. Well, it's time for an update.

1. Domestic 101
I guess it's true that where there's smoke, there's fire because someone's ass got smoked. Now, before you thugs think there was a murder next door, let me clarify. All that punk-a$$ muthaphukin name callin' turned into a whole lot of someone getting the hell out of that house. It seems lady #2 and all her chillren done packed up. As the story goes, her blinged out SUV didn't spend the night at home. On Saturday, a bunch of people showed up over there... followed by a couple cop cars... followed by a bunch of people leaving. Now, I really don't know what happened by the 911 call that was labeled an "Investigation," but I'm guessing someone threw a table and a can of beans. I'm guessing there were some more f* words and then someone got slapped across the face with a frozen tuna. I'm just speculating.

Regardless, on Monday the moving truck showed up. Random people I've never seen were loading what seemed an entire house in there followed by some station wagons, rimmed up SUV's and a few busted hoopties to gather the rest of the belongings. Heck, someone was even nice enough to put most of it in the driveway and then shut the garage door. Awesome. Well, whatever really happened, I'm guessing it wasn't any fun and best of luck to the two of them. Now, whoever's still at the house needs to suck it up and mow their grass.

2. Comment on this pic
Comment on this pic girl has a new trick. No longer does she just sit on her roof and make calls, she also trespasses and generally pisses me off. You see, I was out in the driveway pushing around a tricycle when "always on her cell phone Sally" decides to cut through the yard. Strike 1. When she gets to the drive, she decides to cut across the concrete right in front of me. Matter of fact, she was so close, she almost ran into me when I stuck out my arm and told her to go around. I followed that with a, "You shouldn't be cutting through the yard anyway," to which she replied, "uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I responded with a, "What? No, you wait!" I guess she realized it was on because she stopped, took off her flip flops and ran away. (I did, however, give her bonus points for never hanging up the phone)

Hindsight being 20/20, I thought I better get a consult from our local 5.0 in case someone decided to do some not-so-ethical police reporting. The officer acknowledged the frustration but agreed there wasn't much he could do. (He did say I could yell all I wanted as long as it didn't become physical or threatening.... yay!) I calmed down and it was done.

The next day I bumped into my other neighbor and told her the story. She expressed her frustration and we parted ways. Now, they have two nogs. What's a nog? It's a not dog. Ok, it's technically a dog but far smaller than God ever intended. Now, these nogs routinely go into the back yard unsupervised to "drop off some friends." As normal, the neighbor let her dogs out without looking and, when she heard a scream, realized our friend had returned for a cut-through. Realizing what was going on, the neighbor ran outside, made sure the girl was ok, then proceeded to verbally flog our roof dwelling friend ultimately running her out of the yard. Ahhh, bliss. Unfortunately, this Einstein hasn't gotten the clue and continues to walk through the yards. Guess it's time for some shenanigans... where's my broom?